How a Picture Book Can Help Teachers Protect Their Energy
Teaching is full of relationships between students, colleagues, administrators, and of course, ourselves. And sometimes, those relationships aren’t easy. Hurt feelings, miscommunication, or even bullying dynamics can pop up in ways that leave us feeling isolated or drained.
That’s why I’ve always loved using the picture book Ugly Fish by Kara LaReau. On the surface, it’s a story about a mean fish who won’t share his tank and ends up lonely. But underneath, it’s really about something much bigger: how our choices in relationships ripple back to us.
And if we pause, it has a lot to say to us as teachers, too.
A Mirror for the Classroom (and Ourselves)
When I first read Ugly Fish to my class, I noticed how quickly students picked up on the lesson: being unkind doesn’t just hurt others, it leaves you empty too.
But here’s what struck me—how often do we as teachers forget that lesson ourselves?
We push through without asking for help.
We give and give until there’s nothing left.
We isolate when what we really need is connection.
Like Ugly Fish, we sometimes build walls without meaning to and the cost is our own well-being.
Teaching as a Relationship Practice
Ugly Fish reminds us that teaching is not just about content, it’s about relationships. And relationships with both students or colleagues require:
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Boundaries: Saying no when your tank is already full.
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Generosity: Letting others in, instead of holding everything too tightly.
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Repair: Owning when we’ve been short, frustrated, or closed off, and starting fresh.
When we model this, our students see that healthy relationships are possible. And when we practice it ourselves, we create classrooms (and schools) where we don’t feel so alone.
Why This Matters for Teacher Well-Being
So often, teacher stress comes not just from grading or lesson planning, but from the emotional load of navigating heavy relationships.
Choosing kindness, connection, and healthy boundaries isn’t just “good teaching.” It’s a resilience practice. It’s how we protect our energy, sustain joy, and keep showing up.
🌱 Reflection Prompt for You
As you think about your own “tank,” ask yourself:
👉 “Where am I holding back from connection? Where might I need to let someone in or set a boundary?”
Sometimes teacher wellness isn’t about adding more self-care practices. It’s about tending to the relationships that shape our days.
✨ Small Shift You Can Try Tomorrow
Before dismissal, invite your students (and yourself) to name one act of kindness they can choose tomorrow. Write them on sticky notes and post them on a “Kindness Tank” in your classroom.
You’ll end the day with a visual reminder that connection and generosity don’t drain us…they refill us.
